Guard Passing 101

I don't see what the big deal is, passing guard is just this easy. I predict when this information gets out, it revolutionizes MMA and completely removes the ground game from the sport.

Todd Weeks

This man lives at:
7972 Council Road
Lewistown, OH 43333

I know this, because Todd knows this.
His videos are for sale on his website: www.toddweeksmovies.com
Under "Contact Info" on his website:

Contact Info:

If you want to talk to Todd Weeks,

you must send your phone number

in the mail.

I have free long distance, and

I will call you. I enjoy talking

on the phone.

Don't bother sending emails,

they go to another company,

and don't get read.

They are discarded.

I don't own a computer.

Something tells me he is 100% serious... at all times.


P.S. Todd doesn't own a computer so he doesn't realize you can use it to find anyone's phone number: (937) 686-8055.

You Ain't Got No Alibi

These are the ugliest people on the internet, in no particular order.









Bonus Game: The first person to successfully masturbate to any of these photos wins a free Ghost Boner T-shirt. Post your entries in the "Comments" section. Let the games begin!!

Kimbo Slice to Take on Ken Shamrock

You read the title, so you know what's going on. This debacle is set to go down on October 4th on CBS. Shamrock is more washed up than a 19 year old Thai hooker. The guy hasn't won a fight since 2004, and hasn't beat a credible opponent since Dan Severn in 1995. Kimbo...don't get me started, otherwise the NAACP may very well unleash their throng of lawyers on my ass. Let it suffice to say that James Thompson, a man with some serious holes in his game, exposed some pretty serious holes in Kimbo's game. I don't give a shit who wins this fight. I'll watch the damn thing because it's free, but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it. I'd rather watch koala bears fight. As a matter of fact...

I Screwed the Pooch

A couple of days ago, I posted a video of a guy knocking out some jackass that was twirling around the ring like the Queen of all Fairies. It's been brought to my attention that this video is from the movie Never Back Down. I don't know why I thought it was a real fight. This may come as a surprise to some of you, but I drink...lots. All I know is that if you know that the clip is from that movie, I'm way less gay than you. Now we could have just deleted the post and pretended none of this happened, but we're accountable to both of our fans. Here's some boobs. Let's just move past this.

Ghost Boner Classic: Skeletor V. Beastman

Enjoy this classic video from Brandon Dicamillo, psychopath partly responsible for bringing you Jackass.

Holy Reach-Around!

Jesus would give you a reach-around, you know, if he were fucking you in the ass at the time. If this doesn't get us some hate mail, then I don't understand the point of organized religion.

"I think we are dead... time is going by really really really really slowly."

People are laughing, but I am concerned: how slow is time going by? Is this guy faster than everyone else? Or is it like he is in slow motion and everyone else is normal speed? There just isn't enough information given, I mean this guy is a cop he should understand the important details necessary in a 9-1-1 call. All of this is really confusing and unprofessional... the lady doesn't know if she should send an EMT, a coroner, or Jean Claude Van Damme from Timecop.

What the Fuck?

This type of art is apparently called "Macrophile" art. Its made by a guy named gideon, I bet he's normal, you know aside from drawing horse men with six foot penises. I found it shortly after stating out loud that I was probing the outer fringe of weird shit on the internet. You be the judge: did I find it?