The Mustache: Friend or Foe?

"The Stash" is an extremely difficult piece of facial hair to sport well, here are the top five best ever...














5.Hulk Hogan




Iconic 'stash, he has always had it, which is pretty much a must for this list. Bonus points for it being blonde and technically a fu-manchu which is the only type of mustache tough enough for a man named "Hulk"






4.George Parros



Total badass with the flair and upper lip decor of a Spanish Conquistador. Quetzalcoatl wouldn't stand a chance against this guys bare knuckle on-ice antics, and a stash that would make a young Ron Jeremy jealous.



3.Burt Reynolds




Burt Reynolds is either having sex with a model, driving an expensive sports car, or both, at all times. All of the credit for his lifestyle goes to his upper lip resident.





2.Tom Selleck




Now there is some lip fuzz! This man's stash has the power to command armies, disintegrate hymens, and bring men and women to their knees. This is the mustache that made Ferrari a household name. Tom Selleck's mustache is the reason you don't see the mustache that often, it simply sets the bar too high.




1.Sam Elliot

God is jealous of this mustache. There are entire religions based upon this man's facial hair. If everyone's father had a mustache with this much authority, there would be no gay people.

Ghost Boner Classic: True Hollywood Story: Prince

Enjoy this classic skit from The Chapelle Show. This video is very hard to track down due to copyright stuff from comedy central, so sorry if it goes down. In my opinion this one is way better than the famous Rick James skit.

NARP!

Live Action Role Playing, or as its alternatively known the nerdiest thing ever done, ever. Being identified in the following video is the same as getting a vasectomy, you will never reproduce.

Can you believe there are people out there who are acting out world of warcraft and dungeons and dragons? There people are by definition un-athletic and watching them flail around and screech in puberty nerd voices is extremely entertaining. I just want to beat them up and steal their lunch money.

Georges St. Pierre loves nipple play, man-boy

It has recently come to our attention here at Ghost Boner that the general MMA watching public is unaware of the special relationship between The UFC Welterwight Division Champion and the mysterious man, whom we at the Boner refer to simply as "Geoffrey". There is much talk/speculation about the true nature of this relationship. Now, I like to think of it in the context of ancient Greece. GSP is a proud and much decorated warrior, who happens to have a tender, sexually intimate relationship with a strapping young training partner. Its society's problem, man. Why won't you let them live their lives and be happy?

Geoffrey can most often be seen assisting GSP in awkwardly homo-erotic stretching before all of his fights. His greatest public contribution, however, is the ritualistic post-fight victory run around the ring. In this display, the Gallant GSP gallops around the ring to the deafening cheers of the crowd, atop his man-steed, his ebony equine, his black stallion, his homosexual lover, Geoffrey.

Geoffrey has no doubt been on the receiving end of this move.

Cyanide and Happiness

We get a ton of e-mail and a large number of them ask for us to do a daily comic here at Ghost Boner. I can barely remember to shower everyday... and that day-light savings time is every 4 years. Cyanide and Happiness.





Keep those e-mails coming, Boner fans, we would just be a couple of idiots sitting shirtless on the couch with a laptop re-posting the dumb stuff we find on the internet without your undying love and support.

Self Defense for Dorks

All fighters should watch this video...they could learn a lot.

Bas Rutten is Completely Insane

Bas Rutten is an MMA legend...and a possible sociopath with a deep love of the nut shot.

Fedor to Face...Nobody at October Affliction Event

Affliction just announced their head line fight for their October 11th card, and the big surprise was that Fedor Emelianenko isn't on it. Apparently he messed up his thumb on Tim Sylvia's head, giving me one more reason to hate Sylvia. The headline fight is now going to be Josh Barnett vs Andrei Arlovski. As second string fights go, that's a pretty solid one. I like Barnett by hard earned submission, although I'd be willing to guess that the other half of Ghost Boner would disagree. There's also a rumored bout between Matt Lindland and Vitor Belfort on the card, providing hope to those who've been hoping to see Lindland get his head smashed in for a while now. It's nothing personal, the guy just makes Rashad Evans look like Captain Excitement. It'll be interesting to see how the rest of the card shapes up. If it's half as good as their last one, I'll be pretty damn excited. Hopefully Megadeath isn't invited this time around.

Hellboy Takes Dream Lightweight Grand Prix

Joakim "Hellboy" Hansen probably figured that he would pass the time at the Dream Lightweigth Grand Prix finals by beating up Kultar Gill and watching some fights. After Eddie Alvarez was unable to continue due to an eye injury sustained in his semifinal victory over Tatsuya Kawajiri, those plans changed in a hurry. Hansen replaced Alvarez in the final, and performed in a manner befitting a man with nothing to lose. The fight is provided below for your viewing enjoyment.



The downside is that we were deprived of the pleasure of seeing Alvarez beat the pee out of Aoki. The positive is that Alvarez and Hansen both seem dead set on a rematch of their second round fight, which was the definition of a barn burner. The first installment was a legit fight if the year candidate. I know I said that a couple posts ago...deal with my hyperbole. Here's Hansen vs Alvarez I. Enjoy.

Possible Fight of the Year

Eddie Alvarez took on Tatsuya Kawajiri in the semi finals of the Dream Lightweight Grand Prix last weekend. To say that it was a good fight would be a bit of an understatement. If you gave a couple of koala bears some crystal meth and locked them in a tiny room for a little while the results probably wouldn't be this entertaining. I look forward to seeing more fireworks from both in the near future.