After watching this I don't understand why rap battles aren't more popular.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Affliction "Postpones" October Event, Dana White Pollutes Shorts With Glee
Dana White recently foretold that Affliction would be out of business by January. Looks like he may have been a little conservative in that estimate. Their October show, featuring Andrei Arlovski vs Josh Barnett, was postponed until...well, I guess they didn't give a new date. The best part of the whole deal is that they didn't bother to tell Andrei Arlovski. His management found out about it when sherdog.com contacted them for a comment. I'm actually kind of sad about this, but apparently trying to butt heads with the UFC is a pretty terrible idea. I just hope that White softens his "nobody gives a shit about Josh Barnett" stance after Affliction folds for good. I suppose the best news is that this brings us a couple of months closer to the UFC's next attempt sign Fedor, which will bring Couture vs Fedor that much closer to being a reality.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Sad Day for MMA
In a sad bit of news, a body believed to be that of former UFC middleweight champion Evan Tanner was recovered in the Palo Verde moutain region of southern California. On Thursday friends of Tanner's began receiving texts from him saying that he had run out of water and gasoline for his motorcycle. He had been chronicling a planned camping trip on his blog for the past month.
Tanner was one of the cooler guys in the game in my opinion. He learned submissions by watching instructional videos. He made his pro debut on a whim, winning a heavyweight tournament that included Paul Buentello. I always thought that he was one of the guys who embodied the "samurai spirit" that some people like to attribute to MMA fighters. As cliche as it sounds, he fought to test himself, not to make money or be famous. He was a guy most fans would have loved to have a beer with, and he will be missed.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Bad Ass America!
An historic event has occurred over the weekend which must be documented. I new addition to modern vernacular has been made:
America /əˈmɛrɪkə/[uh-mer-i-kuh]adjective:
1. Extremely impressive.
2. Highly unrealistic or impractical; outlandish.
3. Paradigm example of triumph
Examples:
"Man, that F150 is Bad Ass America!"
"Did you see that strippers titties? Those things were so America!"
"I heard you banged that new secretary at the office. Her body is so America"
Something can be described as "America" if it extends a throbbing, erect penis in defiance to all those who are less capable and unable to achieve that which is truly great. That which is "America" is that which all other things would aspire to be.
Use it wisely as a tool to express the extremely positive nature of something which envokes extremely strong feelings of America-ness.
International MMA Nipple Tweaking Conspiracy
A few weeks ago we posted an incriminating gif of Georges St Pierre fooling around with his nipples before a fight. While this was slightly alarming, we thought it was an isolated incident until...
I think it's too early to label this phenomenon industry wide. Originally we thought that St Pierre was doing this as an expression of his thinly veiled homosexuality, but Evans has a wife. If you watched his fight with Chuck Liddell, you no doubt heard her screaming like a banshee when he KO'ed Chuck. I've considered the facts, and I've arrived at this conclusion...Greg Jackson is building life-like androids and sending them in the place of the fighters he "trains". The nipples are dials that they use to change their behavior programming. They twist the nipples and go from Normal Mode to Killing Machine Mode, and it's on. Jackson and his fighters are cashing in without doing shit. Well, I guess they're designing and building sophisticated robots, but that doesn't sound too hard. Think about it, and it all makes sense.
I think it's too early to label this phenomenon industry wide. Originally we thought that St Pierre was doing this as an expression of his thinly veiled homosexuality, but Evans has a wife. If you watched his fight with Chuck Liddell, you no doubt heard her screaming like a banshee when he KO'ed Chuck. I've considered the facts, and I've arrived at this conclusion...Greg Jackson is building life-like androids and sending them in the place of the fighters he "trains". The nipples are dials that they use to change their behavior programming. They twist the nipples and go from Normal Mode to Killing Machine Mode, and it's on. Jackson and his fighters are cashing in without doing shit. Well, I guess they're designing and building sophisticated robots, but that doesn't sound too hard. Think about it, and it all makes sense.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
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